“Cinderella walked on broken glass, Sleeping beauty let her whole life pass by, Belle fell in love with a beast, Pocahontas risked her life for a feast, Jasmine could have had anyone but she chose a poor man, and Ariel, she walked on land.”
So many people dislike fairytales because it makes us believe in love, believe that a prince will swoop down and save us when something goes wrong. But I’ve come to realise that in every fairytale-like movie, every girl took a risk. Took a risk for love, took a risk in the name of love.
So, how do we know if our own fairytale won’t really happen if we don’t try, if we stop believing in love?
I know it’s hard for some of you to put down their guard and to learn to trust someone else sometimes. I know because I’ve been through it. People like us, we distance ourselves from people we genuinely like just because we are afraid to get hurt. But does building up these walls ultimately saves us from hurting?
It doesn’t.
We’ve got to know that these people, the people we are blocking out because of our own insecurities, will leave someday too. Leave for something better. Everyone will cause you pain and hurt and tears, but you have to decide who’s worth it. And when you make that decision, happiness will come to you. =)
Thursday, October 21, 2010
I'll always love you, no matter what
Our first looks at each other, our first conversation, our first kiss. Our first text message and our first real talk. I'll never forget. Never forget the feelings and how perfect everything was. We could be awake and talk about everything until the next morning, we could talk in the cellphone for hours without having any words left to say and we could lay down for a very long time and just stare into each others eyes without saying anything. It was love. Real love.
We became closer and closer and when i thought it couldn't be better he whispered the three most beautiful words in my ear. He whispered "I love you" with a tear in his eye and said that he never thought he could have this feelings for anyone. It was the best moment of my life. I was in love. Terrible in love.
We talked about how our apartment would look like, what name our baby should have and that we are going to have a little kitten. Then we laughed for hours about what we just said.
We talked about everything and we laughed, cried and did things together. That was life. You were life. You were the best boyfriend ever and everything would have been meaningless if you weren't in my life. I would go to the moon, travel round the world and count all the stars. Just for you.
We were so equal you and me, but different at the same time. We had something that other people just could dream of.
I'll never forget how you said I was beautiful when i looked the most terrible than ever. And I'll never forget how special you made me feel. You had girlfriends before but I was the only one you fell in love with and I was the only one you ever cared about.
Every time I got a text message from you my heart stopped and every time I saw you called me I got a smile on my lips. You were mine.
But things changed. I can't count the sleepless nights and how many tears that have fell down on my cheek. I can't count how many times my heart got in thousand pieces and when everything felt meaningless. I have been so loved by you, but you have hurt me so badly at the same time. I never thought we would come to this part in our relationship were we don't show any respect and neither can live with or without each other. But now we stand here and don't know what's right or wrong. The only thing I know is that I'll always love you, no matter what.
We became closer and closer and when i thought it couldn't be better he whispered the three most beautiful words in my ear. He whispered "I love you" with a tear in his eye and said that he never thought he could have this feelings for anyone. It was the best moment of my life. I was in love. Terrible in love.
We talked about how our apartment would look like, what name our baby should have and that we are going to have a little kitten. Then we laughed for hours about what we just said.
We talked about everything and we laughed, cried and did things together. That was life. You were life. You were the best boyfriend ever and everything would have been meaningless if you weren't in my life. I would go to the moon, travel round the world and count all the stars. Just for you.
We were so equal you and me, but different at the same time. We had something that other people just could dream of.
I'll never forget how you said I was beautiful when i looked the most terrible than ever. And I'll never forget how special you made me feel. You had girlfriends before but I was the only one you fell in love with and I was the only one you ever cared about.
Every time I got a text message from you my heart stopped and every time I saw you called me I got a smile on my lips. You were mine.
But things changed. I can't count the sleepless nights and how many tears that have fell down on my cheek. I can't count how many times my heart got in thousand pieces and when everything felt meaningless. I have been so loved by you, but you have hurt me so badly at the same time. I never thought we would come to this part in our relationship were we don't show any respect and neither can live with or without each other. But now we stand here and don't know what's right or wrong. The only thing I know is that I'll always love you, no matter what.
up to how you really feel
Hey "bestest" friend. You know who you are.
I'm just writing this to say that I've been thinking a lot lately and I realize this is going nowhere. We can never really talk heart to heart and that's what I want. Communication is just really important to me. Although it's kind of hard, I kept trying and I sometimes worked but never for a long time. It's hard for me to commit without you. So please, tell me if you really do like me, so I that I will know if my efforts are worth for anything at all. Don't hint some remark that could possibly be known as flirting. Because that gets me confused and mad. For all I know, you could be just really friendly and has not thought of us to be more than friends. Your actions and words speak otherwise...
And with all I know, I've been liking you for a few years now. And I can't wait any longer. I need answers.
So here's to the possibilities. Either you end this unknown and tell me how you really feel or I just walk away. Even being just friends with you is too hard. I need to move on. I can't be stuck waiting.
And whether you read this or not, it's going to be here. Whether you reply to this or not, it's up to how you really feel.
I'm just writing this to say that I've been thinking a lot lately and I realize this is going nowhere. We can never really talk heart to heart and that's what I want. Communication is just really important to me. Although it's kind of hard, I kept trying and I sometimes worked but never for a long time. It's hard for me to commit without you. So please, tell me if you really do like me, so I that I will know if my efforts are worth for anything at all. Don't hint some remark that could possibly be known as flirting. Because that gets me confused and mad. For all I know, you could be just really friendly and has not thought of us to be more than friends. Your actions and words speak otherwise...
And with all I know, I've been liking you for a few years now. And I can't wait any longer. I need answers.
So here's to the possibilities. Either you end this unknown and tell me how you really feel or I just walk away. Even being just friends with you is too hard. I need to move on. I can't be stuck waiting.
And whether you read this or not, it's going to be here. Whether you reply to this or not, it's up to how you really feel.
All I wanted all day was a chance to see you
I could have gone home early today but i didnt.
I didnt because the only thing i could think about was that i wanted to see you and the only instance whereby i could conceive this happening- where i might get a chance to see you- was if you decided to take the train home and we would happen to cross paths. So i stood in front of the train station tonight, waiting like some kind of fool. Fool because i didnt even know what i was waiting for. For you to come down the escalator? To see you? Would we even speak? I didn't even know if you were in the city today. I didnt know if you would even take the train if by some chance you were in the city. For all i knew you could have been at home or anywhere else for that matter. So i stood like a prize idiot, waiting there by myself. Not even knowing what i was waiting for.
Here is my confession, I’m Weak. So for maybe a minute or an hour or for however long it takes before my pride take over once again, i’m going to be okay with not being okay. And i’m going to say that i miss you and i’m going to admit that i stood in front of a train station for over an hour tonight just because all i wanted all day was a chance to see you.
I didnt because the only thing i could think about was that i wanted to see you and the only instance whereby i could conceive this happening- where i might get a chance to see you- was if you decided to take the train home and we would happen to cross paths. So i stood in front of the train station tonight, waiting like some kind of fool. Fool because i didnt even know what i was waiting for. For you to come down the escalator? To see you? Would we even speak? I didn't even know if you were in the city today. I didnt know if you would even take the train if by some chance you were in the city. For all i knew you could have been at home or anywhere else for that matter. So i stood like a prize idiot, waiting there by myself. Not even knowing what i was waiting for.
Here is my confession, I’m Weak. So for maybe a minute or an hour or for however long it takes before my pride take over once again, i’m going to be okay with not being okay. And i’m going to say that i miss you and i’m going to admit that i stood in front of a train station for over an hour tonight just because all i wanted all day was a chance to see you.
Too beautiful?
You're beautiful but you don't mean a thing to me.
It's hard to fabricate lies when you don't want to make someone sad. When you really really like them...but not in that way. You can't just blatantly lie to them and pretend you love them...they're too beautiful for that. The thing is, they're also too beautiful to lie to. Too beautiful for you to hurt because you don't want to hurt them.You don't want to make them cry, to ruin their beauty by making them feel pain. The problem is...you can't not. You have to do one or the other......the pain...or the lies? Which is the best for them? Break their heart now.....or later. Later when they find out you never liked them like that. That when you kissed them you had to try you're hardest not to be disgusted because, yes they were beautiful but they weren't who you wanted. They were perfect but they just didn't have that special something. You don't want them to feel like it was their fault. Like they aren't perfect or beautiful. You want them to know that it's you. You're the one with the issue and you wish, wish that you could love them......but you can't. And it's killing you. You don't want it to be like that. You want to love being kissed by them. You want to lust after them. To give them your heart and soul.....but you simply just can't. You're incapable of feeling like that and it sucks. They're incredibly beautiful so beautiful that it hurts. And you can't hold back, you just have to tell them, you can't not. Because you know, you know deep down that this is for the best. That this is what you need to do and you do it. You don't want to and you despise yourself for it.....but you do it. You can't handle the pain that is shown upon this beautiful person so...you leave but just before you go you say those five dreaded words.....it's not you, it's me.
It's hard to fabricate lies when you don't want to make someone sad. When you really really like them...but not in that way. You can't just blatantly lie to them and pretend you love them...they're too beautiful for that. The thing is, they're also too beautiful to lie to. Too beautiful for you to hurt because you don't want to hurt them.You don't want to make them cry, to ruin their beauty by making them feel pain. The problem is...you can't not. You have to do one or the other......the pain...or the lies? Which is the best for them? Break their heart now.....or later. Later when they find out you never liked them like that. That when you kissed them you had to try you're hardest not to be disgusted because, yes they were beautiful but they weren't who you wanted. They were perfect but they just didn't have that special something. You don't want them to feel like it was their fault. Like they aren't perfect or beautiful. You want them to know that it's you. You're the one with the issue and you wish, wish that you could love them......but you can't. And it's killing you. You don't want it to be like that. You want to love being kissed by them. You want to lust after them. To give them your heart and soul.....but you simply just can't. You're incapable of feeling like that and it sucks. They're incredibly beautiful so beautiful that it hurts. And you can't hold back, you just have to tell them, you can't not. Because you know, you know deep down that this is for the best. That this is what you need to do and you do it. You don't want to and you despise yourself for it.....but you do it. You can't handle the pain that is shown upon this beautiful person so...you leave but just before you go you say those five dreaded words.....it's not you, it's me.
Just don't let go of me now
Love is something I’ve been cautious of. You know this, because you were there when he broke my heart. It had been coming for a while, but that night my world shattered. You saved me. I lost myself in you quickly, you were everything I needed. You never pressured me, and you kissed me in ways he hadn’t in months. You knew where I was coming from, because you had done it to her.
Love is not something I was looking for. I just needed an escape, but falling asleep in your arms night after night and your perfect smile caught me off-guard. We were never too serious, but we were each others. We needed each other to mend. And so we did.
It has been almost a year and a half since I could spend my every day with you. You left, and I went to discover the world. Somehow, we never stopped being each other’s. Somewhere along the way, we fell in love.
Now, we hang in limbo. The way I need you never seems to fade, but yours comes and goes like the wind. You tell me you love me, and then you fight with your heart and try to keep yourself away. Of course it isn’t easy, but we’ve always made it work. We’re both hanging on for the time in our lives where we end up in the same place. We both know it’s going to be worth it.
So whatever you do, just don’t let go of me now.
Love is not something I was looking for. I just needed an escape, but falling asleep in your arms night after night and your perfect smile caught me off-guard. We were never too serious, but we were each others. We needed each other to mend. And so we did.
It has been almost a year and a half since I could spend my every day with you. You left, and I went to discover the world. Somehow, we never stopped being each other’s. Somewhere along the way, we fell in love.
Now, we hang in limbo. The way I need you never seems to fade, but yours comes and goes like the wind. You tell me you love me, and then you fight with your heart and try to keep yourself away. Of course it isn’t easy, but we’ve always made it work. We’re both hanging on for the time in our lives where we end up in the same place. We both know it’s going to be worth it.
So whatever you do, just don’t let go of me now.
3 Words
I love you.
Words demand explanation. They require analysis. They are the construction and expression of my thoughts. Of my heart. But they can't describe it. They can't describe any of it. They can't tell you how deep the memories are, or how often I think of them. They can't scream what I really want to say. They are the mask of how I really feel and they try to disguise the pain, but someone will strip it away. And someone will make those words worthless.
So what is a word worth? Nothing. What are three words worth? Nothing. But we say them anyway, because you know. You know, more than anyone what they mean. You know when I say I love you, I really mean that those three words can't describe what it is we have. When I say you're amazing, I know the word is just a cover; a quick way for me to remember all the things that amaze me about you, a mask for the memories we share, a disguised version of our adventures together. And I really believe that you know, when I say I miss you, it's not just that. I miss you every moment, and I miss just what your name means to me. It means an alphabet of sounds and letters and words. But none of them really mean anything, because words are based on trust, they rely on how truly and deeply we feel. Remember, always, that they don't mean anything, they are letters and they are constructions, but we deconstruct them every day and we twist them; we manipulate them so that they say what we want them to. But no word, no shape, no photograph could ever twist so far that it could begin to explain even a little bit of how I feel.
Words demand explanation. They require analysis. They are the construction and expression of my thoughts. Of my heart. But they can't describe it. They can't describe any of it. They can't tell you how deep the memories are, or how often I think of them. They can't scream what I really want to say. They are the mask of how I really feel and they try to disguise the pain, but someone will strip it away. And someone will make those words worthless.
So what is a word worth? Nothing. What are three words worth? Nothing. But we say them anyway, because you know. You know, more than anyone what they mean. You know when I say I love you, I really mean that those three words can't describe what it is we have. When I say you're amazing, I know the word is just a cover; a quick way for me to remember all the things that amaze me about you, a mask for the memories we share, a disguised version of our adventures together. And I really believe that you know, when I say I miss you, it's not just that. I miss you every moment, and I miss just what your name means to me. It means an alphabet of sounds and letters and words. But none of them really mean anything, because words are based on trust, they rely on how truly and deeply we feel. Remember, always, that they don't mean anything, they are letters and they are constructions, but we deconstruct them every day and we twist them; we manipulate them so that they say what we want them to. But no word, no shape, no photograph could ever twist so far that it could begin to explain even a little bit of how I feel.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
